Posted by: michelle @ books my kids read | October 4, 2010

losing my zen

I’ve been trying to be so good. I’ve been trying to be patient, but I don’t think patience is one of my virtues. I’m not in the physical and mental pain that I was while pregnant with the munchkin, but I’m past due now and annoyed. I don’t want to be induced, but I don’t want to be pregnant anymore.

In one of the many websites I’ve found recently, a number of midwives calculate their clients due dates at 41 or 42 weeks rather than 40 because so few women actually give birth by 40 weeks.  That’s great and all, but the non-midwife world of modern obstetrics doesn’t want women to go past 41 weeks so even the doctors start talking about induction when you hit 39 weeks. The part that kills me is that I know a ton of women who have recently had babies and every single one of them went early. When I was pregnant with the munchkin I had a friend who was due right before me and went early. Then there is me. So while the statistics say that 50 to 70% of women go past 40 weeks, I seem to surround myself with the women who go early. That makes it that much more difficult.

My other problem right now seems to be the fact that my parents are here. Don’t get me wrong, I’m absolutely thrilled that they are here, especially in the afternoons when I’m tired and struggling to entertain the munchkin. However, I’m completely out of my own routine and feeling useless. It also just emphasizes the fact that I’m “late.” I’m used to having the morning hours to myself, and I enjoy that. I attempt to clean up the house a bit and I veg in front of the television a touch and then I know that I have the afternoon hours to fill keeping my little one occupied. But now, there are grandparents around to keep her happy and that makes me a tad useless. I actually drove her to school this morning and she complained because she wanted grandpa to do it. They’ll take her to gymnastics this afternoon, but it’s just odd.

So I don’t want to be induced, but I’m considering it more. I’d love to stick it out and be patient and let this little girl come out when she is good and ready, but I’d really like that to be sooner rather than later. I’ve done all the good things I’m supposed to do, she’s just apparently comfortable in there. She does get a tad annoyed when I do the 2.2 mile loop around the reservoir (we’ve done this twice over the weekend), but my back is starting to really hurt and so that’s not probably in the cards again. So I will continue to try and be zen, but it is beginning to be more and more of a challenge.



  1. Guess all it took was a little “complaining” about her not being here! And she got the hint! Congratulations!

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